You are Such a T*t Chocolate Message
£20.00
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Make It Extra Special
Assorted Chocolate Boobies
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Don't be a D**k Chocolate Message
£20.00
Assorted Chocolate Boobies
£12.00
Chocolate Bottoms
£12.00
Don't be a D**k Chocolate Message
£20.00
Description
These entertaining chocolates are ideal for someone who likes a bit of banter, certain to make a friend or loved one smile!
Product Details
Nutritional Information
Ingredients & Allergens
May contain traces of Gluten (Barley, Wheat) Nuts (Tree nots, Peanuts)
Delivery & Returns
Handmade Dispatch: As everything is made to order, standard delivery usually ships within 2–3 working days.
- Standard UK Shipping: £3.99.
- Next Day Delivery: £6.95. Order by 2pm for next working day delivery (Orders placed Friday arrive Monday).
- NI & Offshore: * Northern Ireland: £8.00 (2–4 days)
- Isles & Channel Islands: £15.00 (2–4 days)
- Missed Delivery: A signature is required. If you're out, the carrier will leave a card to arrange collection or re-delivery.
- Returns: Not 100% satisfied? Please contact us and we will aim to resolve any issues as quickly as possible.
Adored by All
FAQ's
What if my chocolate arrives melted or smashed?
We take the hit. If your gift arrives broken or heat-damaged, snap a photo and we’ll dispatch a fresh replacement immediately. Your gift will arrive perfect, guaranteed.
What if it’s late and misses the special day?
Nothing kills a celebration like a late gift. Use our Tracked 24 or Special Delivery at checkout to hit your deadline. Watch the countdown on the product page to see exactly when we ship.
What if it looks "cheap" or nothing like the photos?
This isn't mass-produced plastic. It’s hand-carved Belgian chocolate from our Somerset studio. Scroll to our Customer Gallery to see unedited photos from real buyers - what you see is what they get.
What if the recipient has a dangerous allergy?
We don't hide the facts. Every product page has a clear Allergy Alert. If you’re worried about a specific ingredient, jump on our Live Chat for an instant answer before you buy.
What if I want a refund because I’ve changed my mind?
It’s food, so we can't restock it. But if you’re unhappy with the quality or service, we won't hide behind a policy. Contact us and we’ll find a solution that leaves you smiling.
Does it tastes like waxy "novelty" chocolate?
"Novelty" doesn't mean low-grade. We use premium Belgian cocoa with a high butter content for a smooth melt. If it doesn't taste as good as it looks, tell us - we’ll make it right.
What if they see the price inside the box?
We’re gifting experts. We never include invoices or price tags in the parcel. Your recipient sees the beautiful chocolate and your note; the "boring" stuff stays in your inbox.